Bizarre News-Naked Workers

NAKED WORKERS
PARIS (AP) - Some French workers feel they have nothing to loose -- so they're loosing shirts and pants. Fifteen men who work at a struggling heater factory in northwest France are posing for a nude calendar. They hope to expose their plight. While they may not save their jobs, they are saving a bit of their modesty. Some strategically placed props keep the workers from being over exposed. Mr. February is wearing nothing but a cardboard box. Mr. October is posed like the renowned Rodin  sculpture "The Thinker." The workers' union says they've sold 2,000 of the $10 calendars in just three days.

SAFECO FIELD-STRIPPERS
SEATTLE (AP) - It's the Seattle Mariners versus the DreamGirls. Now, the Mariners are dropping their legal fight to keep a strip club from opening near the ballpark. In exchange, owners of the DreamGirls club have agreed to limit outdoor ads and signs. DreamGirls will also provide private security outside the club. The strip club is about 400 feet away from Safeco Field. The Mariners had sued to block the place from opening. The team argued the strip club would have a negative effect on families visiting the stadium.

POSH PENTHOUSE
SAN FRANCISCO (AP) - Now, you too can live like a president or a prince. That is if you have the bucks. San Francisco's famed Fairmont Hotel is updating the penthouse suite. JFK stayed there and so has Prince Charles. The suite takes up the entire eighth floor. It has three bedrooms with baths, a formal dining room seating 60 and a terrace overlooking the city and San Francisco Bay. Guests also get a butler, housekeeper, chef, masseuse and personal trainer and a fully stocked gourmet kitchen. If you can tear yourself away, guests have the use of a Ferrari California. The Fairmont's Tom Klein says at 15-grand a night, the penthouse is "a giveaway."

FAKE NEW YORK POST
NEW YORK (AP) - It sure looks like the New York Post. The massive headline reads: "WE'RE SCREWED." But thousands of New York straphangers found they had been punk'd. The Post was a spoof, timed for today's U.N. summit on climate change. Stories in fake paper predict "massive climate catastrophes" and "public health disasters." A statement from the real Post calls the parody a "limp effort." The statement adds the Post won't "be hiring any of their headline writers."

BORDER-FAST BOAT
DETROIT (AP) - The border patrol is feeling the need for speed. The Department of Homeland Security is showing off a $900,000 prototype high speed patrol boat. It was demonstrated yesterday on the Detroit River. The 43-foot craft is powered by four 350-horsepower engines. The Detroit Free Press reports the boat has a top speed of about 75 mph, compared with about 62 for current models. It's also packing plenty of high-tech power. Cameras can lock on to suspects a mile away. The government says heat sensors on the boat can pick out targets at a distance of three miles.

EMU LOOSE
FOREST, Miss. (AP) - Officers had to use a stun gun and handcuffs to capture the fugitive. But in this case they weren't after a bad guy, just an emu running loose. Drivers on I-20 in central Mississippi had made many calls to 911, over several days, to report two big birds on the highway. Authorities managed to spot one of the emus Sunday near an entrance ramp. The big bird was dodging traffic. But officers managed to capture it, cuff it and cart it away. Authorities are now trying to find someone's who's missing an emu.

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