The bright side of not being there

Jessica Lee is a busy nurse and single mom to four children who are active in everything from music to football. She struggles to juggle their performances and games with everything else life demands.

Lee explains, "I work long hours and I can't be there for every game. I feel terrible when I miss something. You know, it hurts."

Experts argue today's parents are pulled in so many directions that the guilt is through the roof.

"If they work, they feel extra guilty, if they're not spending time individually with each of their kids. You know, parents feel guilty about so many more things," says Mindful Parenting Coach Ali Katz.

One recent survey found half of working dads and 56-percent of working moms find it hard to balance all their responsibilities.

But Katz says you can actually use that guilt as a teaching moment for your kids, explaining, "Feelings of disappointment or frustration are temporary. They don't last forever. We all have uncomfortable feelings. We have to learn how to maneuver them, deal with them, and then they pass and we're on to something that feels better."

Katz says you can also work with your kids and your tribe to come up with creative solutions when you can't be at an event in person. "A partner, a family member, a friend can FaceTime you in, can text you updates of scores, can take pictures for you," she says. Then, you can re-live the experience with the kids later.

The key is to show your children your relationship is about more than one performance. That's what Jessica does.

"I'm there for every performance every game that I can be there for and they know that. And so, that's what's important," she explains.
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